READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I enjoy the company of your penis
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
