she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
