I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
