we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
