i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
