Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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