Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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