Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Randomize