I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
