kristin has been a bad kristin
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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