Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
