In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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