Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
