I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Tell her she can't have a vagina
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
