I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
you will always have a special place in my vag
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
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