Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
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