Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
