But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
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