don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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