Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
