the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
