He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
we're so committed to being not committed
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
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