and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
