Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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