i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
