apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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