i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
