When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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