forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
PANTIES FOUND
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