I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
