Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize