You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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