I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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