the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Randomize
