How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
