"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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