Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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