I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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