And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night�
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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