If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
