I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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