why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
It's official drugs can't kill me
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
How does one acquire holy water?
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
