haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
