Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
