So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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