another moral hangover. fuck.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
