you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
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