i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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