fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
