You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
